DEAR ABBY: I’ve a 4-year-old daughter. She spends time at her grandma’s home and does arts and crafts initiatives there. When my MIL drops her off, she brings the undertaking to our home. We take pleasure in seeing it for a number of days, and my daughter performs with it for a number of days.
Then it will get added to the remainder of her toys. I wish to give them again to my mother-in-law, however is it well mannered to ship them? They’re genuinely cute initiatives, so I don’t wish to throw them away, however we now have an excessive amount of stuff right here.
This similar dilemma arises with birthday and Christmas presents. My daughter receives good presents, however we don’t wish to maintain them at our home, so we’ve requested my mother-in-law to maintain some at her home for when my daughter visits. I feel she’s offended by the request.
Ought to we simply maintain the initiatives and presents and ultimately throw them away or donate them? Or ought to we be sincere and ask for an alternate? I’m undecided honesty is welcomed in society anymore. Your ideas are appreciated. — HONESTLY UNSURE
DEAR UNSURE: If Grandma needed the toys and artwork initiatives at her home, she wouldn’t be sending them dwelling along with your daughter. I do suppose a “fact session” is so as. The lead-in needs to be one thing like this: “Ethel, honey, we want you’ll maintain a few of our little angel’s toys at your home so she will be able to take pleasure in them whereas she’s visiting you. This stuff are piling up at our place and we not have wherever to place them. Would you please assist us out?”
Then, shut your mouth and see how your MIL responds. If she isn’t useful or receptive, toss the stuff sooner quite than later, and pray it doesn’t respect in worth as your budding artist grows older.
DEAR ABBY: I’m wondering what I ought to do a few buddy (“Corinne”) I knew via highschool and who was a bridesmaid in my marriage ceremony. Seven years in the past, my husband was recognized with tongue most cancers and needed to have a 16-hour surgical procedure plus chemo and radiation. I known as Corinne and informed her about my husband’s most cancers and surgical procedure, which was at a hospital three hours from our dwelling. She appeared like she cared and was involved, however she by no means known as or texted me after that. She simply caught her head within the sand and supplied no help whereas I used to be going via this main ordeal.
Now, one other girlfriend from highschool desires me to attend a lunch together with her and Corinne. Ought to I meet them? Or ought to I disown Corinne as a buddy? It nonetheless hurts in any case these years. — WOUNDED IN WISCONSIN
DEAR WOUNDED: Earlier than “disowning” Corinne for having allow you to down whenever you wanted her, go to the lunch along with your mutual buddy and ask her why she disappeared. She could also be embarrassed, however it’s a good query. Corrine’s absence could have been brought on by a terror of most cancers and its therapy, which might be so sturdy that some individuals are afraid to hunt therapy for themselves after they’re recognized. (Years in the past, I misplaced an exquisite buddy as a result of he handled his liver most cancers “homeopathically.”)
Expensive Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also referred to as Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Expensive Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.